Deep Space Nine: Civil Defense

Deep Space Nine Reactions: The Abandoned

An Honest Review Of Mixtape

It's been a while since I sat down to write an actual blog post, with work, other writing projects, streaming and soon to have a roommate. But after playing Mixtape, I thought it would be better if I wrote what I thought instead of doing a video.

For those unaware, Mixtape is an 'interactive mid 1990s nostalgia focused narrative experience in the guise of a 'video game'. Now why did I choose those particular words to describe it? Simple, because that is exactly what it is, it is every single trope one can associate specifically with Late Generation X, those born 1976 to 1980, from the fashion, to the music selection to the lingo and even the angst. If this was something targeting Millennial nostalgia of the mid 1990s, the music would've been a hell of a lot of better and the characters would be better dressed.

But let's focus on the nostalgia that Mixtape features because it's narrative is completely dependent on Ferris Bueller Day's Off and Wayne's World style fourth-wall breaking which is done by the main character Sally, and just like Ferris and Wayne in their movies, Sally is a typical depiction of a Gen-X teen: completely self absorbed in every single way, wanting things perfect. They are 'never wrong', even though they are. The story is a typical 'one last hurrah' before folks go their separate ways, with broken promises, expectation, a typical argument where everyone is an asshole. You have typical tropes such as Officer Moreno, the father of a side-kick character Cassandra, who has a change of heart over being so strict because he 'remembered what it was like to be a teenager'. Hell much like the two movies I'm comparing Mixtape to, everything just 'works out fine' for the protagonist. And this is not even getting into the 'run sequence' that is beat for beat a rip off of Ferris' run in the climax of that film. 

This leads me to the music, and the developers, Beethoven & Dinosaur, putting out a Tweet stating that will not be a streamer mode, claiming Mixtape is about 'music', it's about Devo, Smashing Pumping, Lush and Alice Coltrane, that they could not change the 'levels' because they were 'designed around the songs' and they could not replace them. To which I say, that's just being lazy, because with the money spent on licensing songs from Devo, The Cure, Stan Bush, BJ Thomas, Iggy Pop,  Roxy Music and Rainbow, the developers could have had a proper alternate soundtrack, because no Twitch Streamer on YouTuber in their right mind is going to risk DMCA claims to a mediocre tune by Mitch Murder or Harper's Bizarre.

 Which leads to the 'levels', and boy we're using that term loosely. What that is referring to is extended sequences where you may be on a 'rail', skateboarding, riding in a shopping cart, headbanging, triggering fireworks, running fancy free in a field, flying in the or the aforementioned Ferris Bueller style run... and thes sequences are timed to roughly fit the length of the song. And for the most part, well 95% of it, you don't have to do anything, you don't have to press buttons, maybe just move the analog stick slightly to avoid 'crashing' in the skateboarding or cart sections, but Mixtape 'plays itself'. Sure, there are rooms and areas where you can 'explore', areas where you are walking around (such as the abandoned dinosaur theme park) but everything is so linear where you are shown exactly what you need to fine to advance the narrative. Oh and  you get some 'mini-games', like skipping stones in a lake, throwing rocks at bottles, or batting practice, or sweeping leaves. But with the exception of the 'skipping stones' bit where you can spend as much time there as you want, everything progresses as soon as its done. 

I would dare say, less than 10% of Mixtape features genuine game play, which is atrocious when compared to other narrative heavy games that people are comparing this favorably too, such as Telltales' The Walking Dead. There is nothing about Mixtape that comes close to that level of story telling or game quality. Hell, one can't even compare Mixtape to What Remains of Edith Finch of the two Life of Fly games, because both of those had actual game play. Because there was effort to give a player anything to do, I can't even compare it to Death Come True, which is an FMV game.

The only positive I can truly say is that at least I didn't 'pay' for it, since it was on Game Pass. And I'm not really all that incline on going back to get the achievements I missed for the 1000 Gamer Score.. In fact, Mixtape joins a short list of games I will never play again, which includes The Last of Us, South Park Snow Day and TellTale Game's The Expanse.  

In closing, I say this, if you're an Xbox gamer and want three to four hours to fill, Mixtape will at least do that, otherwise, if you're on Steam, Nintendo or PlayStation consoles... skip it unless you get it almost nothing. Like I'm talking 90 to 95% off. 

Deep Space Nine Reactions: Second Skin

Deep Space Nine Reaction: Equilibrium

Deep Space Nine Reactions: The House Of Quark

Deep Space Nine Reactions: The Search Part II

Deep Space Nine Reactions: The Search Part 1

Deep Space Nine Reactions: The Jem'Hadar

El Monje Alto (The Tall Monk) - An Idea For Resident Evil 4

 One of the things I've felt was missing from Resident Evil 4 was truly memorable 'creature' that was on par with Mr. X or Nemesis in Resident Evil 2 and 3... or even Jill Valentine herself in Resident Evil 5. So here is my idea of what could've been

 El Monje Alto... or rather... The Tall Monk

 This would be a massive, towering humanoid created by Los Illuminados as a mobile enforcer, a ritural guardian meant to retrieve escaped sacrifices and protect sacred sites. Unlike Mr. X which was a case of bio-engineered precision, the Monk is a fusion of brute strength, parasitic control and religious symbolism. Because if you're going to have a cult, you need proper muscle. Thus, The Monk is not a silent lab creation, hit's a walking sermon.

So the way I figure, Saddler selected an extremely devout villager for 'ascension', the Plaga being allowed to mature far beyond normal to reshape physiology of the 'volunteer'. 

 Physical Build

• Height: 7’5”–8’0”, towering over villagers
• Frame: Broad‑shouldered, thick‑limbed, built like a stone pillar
• Movement: Slow, deliberate, ritualistic; each step feels like a church bell tolling
• Presence: His silhouette resembles a monk or executioner, but unnaturally elongated

His proportions are subtly wrong — arms a little too long, posture a little too rigid — hinting at the Plaga’s influence.

Attire 

1. Heavy Monk’s Habit
A long, dark brown woolen robe, the kind worn by rural religious orders in old Spanish mountain regions.
•     Hood always up, shadowing his face
•     Fabric worn, frayed, stained by age and weather
•     Rope belt tied in a ceremonial knot

2. Leather Shoulderguards
Simple, hand‑stitched leather pauldrons, the kind a villager might craft.
•     Reinforced with metal studs
•     Symbolic carvings of the Los Iluminados insignia

3. Workman’s Boots
Heavy mountain boots, cracked and mud‑stained.
•     Thick soles
•     Iron toe caps
•     Designed for rough terrain

4. Iron Mask (Optional Variant)
Some versions of the cult’s guardians wear masks.
For El Monje Alto:
•     A simple forged iron mask with narrow eye slits
•     No expression, no ornamentation
•     Looks like something a blacksmith villager could make

Behavior & Role

Appears when:
•     A sacrifice escapes 
•     A ritual is interrupted
•     A Plaga‑infected subject resists the hive’s influence

Behavioral Traits
•     Moves with slow inevitability
•     Never runs
•     Never speaks
•     Turns his head in small, deliberate motions, as if listening to something only he can hear
•     Responds to the Plaga’s “call” more than to sound

The question will end up being who does The Monk prioritizes, Leon or Ashley? 

 

Get Some Socks, Sigma

Juno:
(deadpan)
Anran. Why is Sigma not wearing shoes?
 

Anran:
(without looking up)
He says footwear disrupts his gravitational harmony.
 

Juno:
Gravitational harmony? He’s hovering three feet off the ground like a philosophical Roomba.
 

Anran:
Exactly. Shoes would ruin the vibe. He’s channeling “space monk chic.”
 

Juno:
He’s channeling frostbite. That floor is marble.
 

[Sigma gently rotates midair, toes flexing like he’s testing the wind.]
 

Sigma:
(serenely)
The universe whispers through my soles.
 

Juno:
The universe is whispering “get some socks.”
 

Anran:
He tried socks. They screamed.
 

Juno:
I’m not even gonna ask.
 

[Illari walks by, glances at Sigma’s feet, then back at Juno.]
 

Illari:
If he dies from toe hypothermia, I’m not healing that.
 

Juno:
Fair. 

 

 

Deep Space Nine Reactions: Tribunal

“The Passive‑Aggression Social Link”

Location: Leblanc, after hours.
Cast: Akechi (confused menace), Haru (smiling doom), Futaba (gremlin fury), Joker (regretting everything)

[Scene opens]
Akechi
(cheerfully sipping coffee)
I must say, Amamiya‑kun, your brew has improved. Almost reminds me of the cup I had the day I—
 

Futaba
(leaning over the counter like a cryptid)
—Killed someone’s mom?
 

Akechi
(blinks)
Pardon?
 

Haru
(smiling with the serenity of a saint who has chosen violence)
Oh, Futaba‑chan, please. There’s no need to be so direct.
(turns to Akechi)
We wouldn’t want to make our guest uncomfortable.
 

Akechi
I… appreciate that? I think?

[Joker quietly backs away toward the stairs]
 

Futaba
(whisper‑shouting)
HE DOESN’T GET IT. HE REALLY DOESN’T GET IT.
 

Haru
(still smiling, but her eye twitches)
It’s alright. Some people simply… forget the consequences of their actions.
Like how some people forget they…
(pauses, voice sweet as honey)
…shot my father in the face.
 

Akechi
(confused, polite, absolutely missing the point)
Ah. Yes. Tragic business, that.
(sips coffee)
But what does that have to do with—?
Futaba
(throws hands up)
OH MY GOD.

[Ryuji enters, sees the situation, immediately turns around]
 

Ryuji
Nope. Not dealing with that. I’m out.

[Haru steps closer, still smiling like a kindergarten teacher about to assign detention]
 

Haru
Akechi‑kun, I just want you to know…
I hold no ill will.
None at all.
(smile widens)
I simply think it’s important to acknowledge the past so we can move forward.
 

Akechi
(relieved)
Ah, good. I’m glad we’re on the same page.
 

Futaba
(leans in, whispering loudly)
She means she wants you to APOLOGIZE, pancake boy.
 

Akechi
Apologize? For what?
 

Futaba
FOR THE MURDER.
THE.
MURDER.
 

Akechi
(tilts head)
You’ll have to be more specific.

[Haru’s smile becomes terrifyingly serene]
 

Haru
Akechi‑kun…
You’ve killed so many people that we need a spreadsheet.
 

Futaba
I already made one.
(slaps a color‑coded chart on the counter)
You’re in the red column.
The VERY red column.
 

Akechi
(stares at chart)
…Oh.
(pauses)
Well.
This is awkward.

[Joker returns with popcorn]
 

Joker
So… are we good?
 

Haru & Futaba
(in perfect harmony)
NO.
 

Akechi
(softly)
I’m beginning to suspect I may have done something to upset them.

[Fade out as Futaba chases Akechi around Leblanc with a rolled‑up newspaper labeled “CONSEQUENCES”]

 

 

Deep Space Nine Reactions: The Collaborator

The Almost‑Victory

INT. TEROK NOR – INTENDANT’S QUARTERS 

The doors slide shut behind Major Kira, sealing her inside the Intendant’s private sanctuary.
Soft Bajoran music plays—familiar, but twisted into something sultry and indulgent.

The lighting is warm, amber, almost like candlelight.The Intendant steps forward, barefoot, relaxed, predatory in her ease. 

INTENDANT KIRA
(smiling like she already won)
You came alone. That’s progress. 

MAJOR KIRA
I came because you said you had information. 

INTENDANT KIRA
I have many things you want. 

She circles her counterpart slowly, studying her with a fascination that borders on reverence.
Major Kira tries to keep her posture rigid, but the closeness is disorienting—like staring into a mirror that whispers. 

INTENDANT KIRA
You know… I used to imagine what you’d be like.
The freedom fighter. The hero. The woman who never compromises.
She brushes a strand of hair from Major Kira’s cheek—gentle, almost tender. 

Major Kira doesn’t pull away. 

Not yet. 

INTENDANT KIRA
And here you are.
Everything I hoped for.
Everything I missed becoming. 

Major Kira swallows. The words hit harder than she wants to admit. 

MAJOR KIRA
You don’t know me. 

INTENDANT KIRA
Oh, but I do.
I know what it’s like to be you.
To want connection so badly it terrifies you.
To hide softness behind anger.
To pretend you don’t crave being understood. 

Major Kira’s breath catches—because the Intendant is too close to the truth. 

The Intendant leans in, her voice dropping to a whisper. 

INTENDANT KIRA
Let me show you what it’s like…
to stop fighting yourself. 

Her hand slides down Major Kira’s arm, fingers intertwining with hers. 

Major Kira doesn’t pull away. 

For a moment—just a moment—she lets herself feel the warmth of someone who looks like her, understands her, mirrors her in ways no one else ever could. 

The Intendant sees the hesitation, the softening, and her smile turns victorious.

INTENDANT KIRA
There it is.
That beautiful surrender.

Major Kira closes her eyes.

She’s so close to leaning in, to letting the moment swallow her, to letting herself be seen in a way she never allows

But then—

A single thought cuts through the haze:
“This woman isn’t me.”

Her eyes snap open.

She steps back, breaking the contact. 

The Intendant freezes, stunned—she had been so sure. 

MAJOR KIRA
(steady, but shaken)
You’re right about one thing.
I do want to be understood.
But not like this.
Not by someone who uses people as toys. 

The Intendant’s expression flickers—hurt, anger, longing, all tangled. 

INTENDANT KIRA
You were mine for a moment. 

MAJOR KIRA
No.
I was almost yours.
There’s a difference. 

The Intendant’s smile returns, but now it’s brittle, wounded. 

INTENDANT KIRA
One day, Nerys…
you’ll wish you hadn’t pulled away. 

Major Kira turns toward the door, her heartbeat still unsteady. 

MAJOR KIRA
Maybe.
But not today. 

She leaves.

The doors close.

The Intendant stands alone, staring at the space where her counterpart had been—so close she could taste victory, and yet denied at the last second.

She touches her own lips, almost in disbelief. 

 

 

Deep Space Nine Reactions: Crossover

PENGUINS OF MADAGASCAR: OPERATION STARFISH SABOTAGE — MISSION BRIEFING

 INT. SUPPLY POD – MAKESHIFT HQ – “BRIEFING ROOM”

SKIPPER
Alright, team. Eyes front, flippers up, snacks down. We’ve got ourselves a planet‑sized pickle.

RICO
HURK …pickle?
(He coughs up an actual pickle.)

SKIPPER
Not that kind, soldier. The Death Star kind. Big, round, evil, and full of stormtroopers who couldn’t hit a barn if it was hugging them.

PRIVATE
But they can hit us, right?

SKIPPER
Only if we stand still, wave our flippers, and politely request it. Which we will not be doing.

KOWALSKI steps forward, tapping the hologram.

KOWALSKI
Gentlemen, behold: the Empire’s ultimate weapon. Capable of destroying planets, vaporizing fleets, and—based on this diagram—running on a cooling system designed by someone who failed basic engineering.

PRIVATE
Is that… duct tape?

KOWALSKI
Imperial‑grade duct tape. Holds star empires together.

SKIPPER
Our mission: disable this floating doom‑ball before Darth Vader arrives in four hours and fifty‑five minutes. That gives us five hours. Tight window. Tighter than Rico’s digestive system.

RICO
HURK
(He coughs up a chainsaw, a bowling ball, and a live pigeon.)

SKIPPER
Case in point.

KOWALSKI flips to a new hologram: a maze of vents.

KOWALSKI
We’ll infiltrate through the ventilation system. It’s extensive, poorly guarded, and conveniently penguin‑sized.

PRIVATE
Why do humans build vents big enough for us to crawl through?

SKIPPER
Because humans are sloppy, Private. Sloppy like a walrus at a fondue fountain.

KOWALSKI
Once inside, we’ll navigate to the reactor coolant regulators. If we disrupt them, the Death Star will enter a full shutdown. No boom. No kaboom. No kaboom‑adjacent kaboom.

RICO
…no boom?
(He looks heartbroken.)

SKIPPER
Chin up, soldier. There’ll be plenty of boom on the way.

Rico perks up immediately.

PRIVATE raises a flipper.

PRIVATE
Um… Skipper? What about the stormtroopers? They’re on high alert.

SKIPPER
Stormtroopers are like seagulls, Private. Loud, annoying, and easily confused by shiny objects.

RICO
HURK
(He coughs up a disco ball.)

SKIPPER
Perfect. Weaponize the sparkle.

KOWALSKI
We’ll also need to pass through a detention block. I suggest disguises.

SKIPPER
Already ahead of you.
(He reveals four tiny Imperial officer hats.)
We go in as “experimental emotional‑support penguins.”

PRIVATE
Do we… actually provide emotional support?

SKIPPER
Only the emotional support of terror and confusion.

KOWALSKI
Once we reach the coolant regulators, I’ll initiate a seventeen‑step shutdown sequence.

SKIPPER
We’ll do the first three steps. The rest sound like nerd stuff.

KOWALSKI
But the remaining fourteen steps are crucial to—

SKIPPER
Nerd. Stuff.

RICO
HURK
(He coughs up a whiteboard that says “NERD STUFF.”)

PRIVATE
And what if Darth Vader arrives early?

SKIPPER
Then we improvise.

PRIVATE
What does “improvise” mean in this context?

SKIPPER
It means Rico throws explosives until the universe sorts itself out.

RICO
YEAH!

KOWALSKI
Time check: five hours until mission failure. Vader ETA: four hours fifty‑five minutes.

SKIPPER
Which means we’ve got a luxurious five‑minute buffer.
(beat)
We’re penguins. We thrive under unreasonable deadlines.

SKIPPER steps forward dramatically.

SKIPPER
Team… this is it. The biggest mission we’ve ever undertaken.
A space station the size of a moon.
Thousands of stormtroopers.
A Sith Lord en route.
And one tiny flaw in their cooling system.

PRIVATE
So… business as usual?

SKIPPER
Exactly.
Now fluff your feathers, tighten your goggles, and prepare for—

ALL
OPERATION STARFISH SABOTAGE!

RICO
HURK
(He coughs up a fish. They all cheer.

Deep Space Nine Reactions: The Wire

Trust Me, I Know What I’m Doing

 

INT. ABANDONED R.P.D. HALLWAY – NIGHT

Moonlight slices through broken windows. Dust hangs in the air. The hallway is silent — until heavy footsteps echo.

SLEDGE HAMMER
(enters frame, revolver drawn)
“Alright, whoever’s been stomping around like a linebacker in a trench coat — show yourself. I’m in no mood for subtlety.”

A towering figure steps into view. MR. X looms, expressionless.

SLEDGE HAMMER
(squints)
“Let me guess. You’re the strong, silent type. Great. I hate those.”

He raises his revolver, aiming squarely at Mr. X’s chest.

SLEDGE HAMMER
“Now, I could ask you to surrender. I could read you your rights. But let’s be honest — you don’t look like a man who respects punctuation.”

Mr. X takes a slow step forward.

SLEDGE HAMMER
(tightens grip)
“Easy, Frankenstein. I’ve got six rounds and a very short temper.”

Beat. Mr. X clenches his fist.

SLEDGE HAMMER
(grins)
“Trust me... I know what I’m doing.”

The camera holds on the standoff — tension thick, silence louder than words.

FADE TO BLACK.

 

 

MAXWELL SMART MEETS DR. NO

Location: Dr. No’s underground lair — a sleek, sterile dining chamber lit like a villain’s dental office.

INT. DR. NO’S DINING HALL – NIGHT
Maxwell Smart is escorted in by two guards wearing radiation badges and expressions of deep regret. Max walks with the stiff confidence of a man who has no idea where he is but refuses to admit it.

He stops at the long dining table, sees the elaborate place setting, and immediately picks up the wrong fork.

MAX
Ah. The shrimp fork. A classic intimidation tactic.

A calm, resonant voice echoes from behind him.

DR. NO (O.S.)
I assure you, Mr. Smart… the cutlery is not meant to intimidate.

Max spins around, nearly tripping over his own chair.

Dr. No enters with the slow, theatrical precision of a man who practices his entrances. His metal hands gleam under the lights.

MAX
Dr. No, I presume. Or should I say… Dr. Negative.

DR. NO
You should not.

Max nods, as if he expected that.

MAX
How about… Dr. Maybe?

Dr. No stares at him, unblinking.

DR. NO
Sit.

Max sits. The chair immediately sinks three inches lower than expected. He pretends this was intentional.

Dr. No takes his seat at the opposite end of the table. A servant pours wine. Max swirls his glass, sniffs it, and then gargles it like mouthwash.

Dr. No’s eye twitches.

DR. NO
You are not at all what I anticipated from CONTROL.

MAX
That’s what they all say. Usually right before I foil their evil plan.

DR. NO
You believe you can foil my plan?

MAX
Would you believe… delay it slightly?

Dr. No steeples his metal fingers, producing a faint metallic clink.

DR. NO
My work is beyond your comprehension. I am on the verge of altering the balance of global power.

MAX
Funny. I once altered the balance of global power by accidentally unplugging a vending machine.

Dr. No blinks. Twice.

DR. NO
Tell me, Mr. Smart… how did you find my island?

MAX
Oh, that was easy. I followed the suspicious radio signals, the trail of missing scientists, and the giant “KEEP OUT OR ELSE” sign on the beach.

DR. NO
That sign was meant to deter intruders.

MAX
Well, it worked on everyone except me.

Dr. No leans forward.

DR. NO
You are either incredibly brave… or incredibly foolish.

MAX
I get that a lot.

Dr. No rises, pacing with slow, deliberate steps.

DR. NO
You meddle in forces you cannot understand. My reactor is a masterpiece of precision. One wrong move could destroy us all.

Max nods solemnly.

MAX
Then it’s a good thing I’m known for my precision.

He immediately knocks over his water glass.

MAX
That was a test. You passed.

Dr. No closes his eyes, inhaling deeply.

DR. NO
You could be useful, Mr. Smart. Join me. I could use a man with your… unpredictability.

MAX
Sorry, I’m loyal to CONTROL. And also I don’t work well with people who have metal hands. They leave fingerprints on everything.

DR. NO
I do not leave fingerprints.

MAX
See? Already a problem.


Dr. No slams his metal hand on the table — a loud, echoing CLANG.

DR. NO
Enough! You will not leave this island alive.

Max stands, adjusting his tie with exaggerated confidence.

MAX
Would you believe… I already left?

DR. NO
No.

MAX
Would you believe… I’m leaving right now?

DR. NO
Also no.

MAX
Would you believe… I’m thinking about leaving?

Dr. No gestures to the guards.

DR. NO
Take him to the reactor chamber. I want him to see the brilliance of my work… before it destroys him.

Max is escorted out.

He turns back to Dr. No.

MAX
Just so you know — I’m not afraid. I’ve faced KAOS agents, double agents, triple agents, and once a very angry poodle.

Dr. No watches him go, baffled.

DR. NO
How has this man survived this long?

Fade out.